Day 16
America, June 2005
Dear The Internet
I'm sorry I haven't written for a while. You will have been worried. I apologise.
I am on tour once again with the band called Aqualung. We have discovered this year that for Americans, calling your band Aqualung is equivalent to calling it "Stairway to Heaven", or "The Dark Side of the Moon", or "Night Flight to Venus". It's tantamount to me introducing myself as "Lord Ben of Guitar". Essentially it's unEnglish. You'd have thought they'd appreciate that. But Matt didn't know, and now he has to live with it.
I hope I have made it abundantly clear among these cyber-pages who I am and what this is, but I'm still concerned that some lost youngling will find themselves here and not know why and end up wetting themselves, so:
I AM BEN HALES I PLAY GUITAR WITH AQUALUNG (SEE ABOVE) WHO IS ALSO MY BROTHER BECAUSE HE IS ILLITERATE I HAVE TO DO THE WRITING I TELL OUR STORY WHEN WE ARE ON TOUR ON HIS WEBSITE AQUALUNG.NET
But there is a problem. I have nothing more to say. June's tour is extremely similar in format to April's, which for some reason is still a little hazy.
So this time I decided to chronicle what we have learned from being on tour in the form of Declarative Statements. This will, I hope, bring you a flavour of the touring experience.
Some of these flavours will be very specific to this tour, and others will have been tasted by everyone who has ever forgone civilisation to live in the halflight of 'The Road'.
I could not have conducted this research without the support and encouragement of the following people, who also made vital contributions to the list:
Matthew Hales, BSc aka 'The Aqualung', David W Price, who played drums for the first half of the tour, Daniel Tuite, who plays keyboards, Marco Meneghin, who played drums for the second half of the tour, Roberto Pieroni, PhD, who was Tour Manager/Soundman, Claire Rosenbaum, who was in charge of press and merchandise, and Cary Brothers and Jason Kanakis who comprised the opening act on the tour and who have never done me any serious physical harm.*
I warmly recommend to you my lords, ladies and gentlemen, The Commandments of The Road.
Yours faithfully
Ben Hales
*apart from the time they kidnapped and brainwashed us. Of course, we can laugh about it now, but there are times when I'm packing the bay and I sense someone behind me. There is no one there, but I find my mind awash with strange memories. When I look down my hands are trembling.
